An Ideal Fourteen Inches

Not as an endowment, of course – my God! Other than visually, perhaps, would a woman have a use for a man that big? Let's just say that I don't know, obviously...
No, what fourteen inches is ideal for, it seems, is good over-the-knee spanking implements, at least for me. As they get shorter they tend to lose effectiveness in that, basically, it seems like my hand gets in the way and I fear that I'm striking as much with my knuckles as my toy. If they get longer, they get harder to control – at least that's the first problem. Fourteen inches for otk seems just right. (Just right for me, Cat likes a twelve-inch limit for toys she uses otk).

This determination does become important, actually. You may be thinking it'd be best to just try something out and see, or hold it in your hand and guess, either one of which would work fine. Where this leads to trouble, though, is when I purchase a lot of "pervertibles" on-line, with little more than the seller's description of it.

Pervertibles, says David Stein, are everyday objects converted to nefarious purposes, primarily for spanking and BDSM. Hairbrushes, belts, and wooden spoons – and I have literally dozens of each – are high on the list of spanking toys, while other objects might be for restraint or touch/sensation play. I suppose a feather duster isn't a pervertible when used on your lover, unless you tie them up first, possibly with pantyhose...

And let's just say I have a lot of pervertibles, having gone through a stage of collecting – or merely accumulating – them, with a lot of help from E-bay and internet shopping. Most of these objects cost literally a dollar or so, definitely under five – plus five to seven dollars for shipping. Now, a dollar I can waste, I'll just buy one less bottle of water – but eight or ten gets a little steep.

Hairbrushes don't range up to fourteen inches, and I have a very short, very thick one that is very popular, but it's an exception. The better ones might make nine inches and normally I find less than eight a little disappointing. I ordered a maple "cookie paddle" which I believe was listed at about seven inches and looked quite promising but really arrived seeming more like six-and-a-half and, while cute, is not useful like I had hoped.
Cooking spoons are the ones where this really comes into play. I've seen some lovely spoons advertised made of great woods and supporting wonderful causes, but they're only eight inches long, which for a spoon is too short. The magic of a spoon, besides the fact that it lives in plain sight, is that the length and speed makes up for the low weight. Once again, we have a beautiful one (from a shop on Venice Beach) that's ten inches and lacks a lot of persuasiveness.

The "other" reason fourteen inches is ideal, however, is because of the "other" pervertible. One year as a safety award the now-defunct company I worked for gave out briefcase-style carry-alls. I usually find these awards to be useless, but keep them anyway, and in this case I'm glad I did. Besides numerous zippered compartments on the outside which I have yet to use, the bag has three large zippered sections. The first section is divided as if for files, perfect for separating paddles. The second section has interior zippered pockets – I used to keep my thumbcuffs in there (note, thumbcuffs do not qualify as a pervertible) and is a good big pocket for a large pile of smackers. Then there's a third pocket which is expandable (and always stuffed, it seems) where I mostly keep restraints and sensation toys, soft stuff and lotions, plus sometimes nice objects that I don't want scratched.

Longer toys can get folded or rolled and put in there but I've found that I don't really like to do this – they often come out bent or curled. And despite what we learned in geometry, the diagonal on this case is barely longer than the legal-sized width, so angling toys seldom helps.

I had a second victory when I was packing for an overnight trip. I don't really have a suitable small bag for my clothes and things – the next one up is a full-sized suitcase. However, this suitcase is about 15" x 24" inside, so I can perfectly fit the toy bag on one half and have the other half for clothes and shaving stuff. Along the top I run all the longer toys that I don't want rolled or folded – a strap that doubles to 18 inches, a shoehorn, backscratcher, and short looped cane, Cat's favorite narrow "Ladies' Strap," my own long narrow stinging strap, a faux birch, rubber loopy, paintstick, rawhide lace flogger and the like. Oh by the way, over half of which are pervertibles.
Maybe I can put up some pictures – with all the time I've put into pervertibles, I ought to be able to get a few posts out of it.